Honey Badger Just Dont Care

Look out Bees and Cobras

Submission for “Ketchup with Us” – Advice

Here is one entry for “Ketchup with Us” – sadly it is the first thing that came to mind. With a week to submit entries, there may be more….

The contest:

We ask that you respond to the prompt in 57 (yes, FIFTY-SEVEN) words or less. You can write a story, poem, experience, post your own picture, a song you wrote in the shower or whatever strikes your fancy. All we ask is for your creativity (and we know you guys have PLENTY of that)!





From an old farmer, who may or may not exist only in my mind:


When milking a goat, choose the teat closest to you and squeeze with your middle finger, then your ring finger, and then your pinky, in one smooth, successive motion. Repeat. If goat only has 1 teat, make sure you at a minimum, get  dinner and a phone call the next day.



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13 thoughts on “Submission for “Ketchup with Us” – Advice

  1. just keep swimming on said:

    Your imaginary farmer gives really solid advice.
    I’m visiting from the Ketchup Prompt.

  2. This is hilarious. Considering I have the fine motor abilities of a toddler, that poor goat would end up milking itself. 😉

    Thanks for linking up!

  3. I LOVE THIS!!!! Hilarious interpretation. Plus now I know how to milk a goat. Which I would imagine is the first step in making goat cheese.

    Awesome job, SF. Thanks for linking up!

  4. Im laughing at people trying to be nice and bring up 1st hand experience or an anecdote….you are more than welcome to just go:


  5. I have no experience with milking anything, so I’m just gonna have to take your word for it and that goat has an impressive beard 🙂

  6. hahaha. This is so funny! I love it.

  7. Honey Badger!!!!! I haven’t been to your blog in FOREVER. This is GREAT. It’s hilarious. It’s PERFECT.

  8. My cousins had a goat farm when I was a teen. Your farmer is exactly right. Except the phone call. There’s rarely a phone in the barn.
    Found you through Ketchup!

  9. Too funny. I have zero goat experience. So I’ll go with your advice the next time I find myself in a goat milking situation.

  10. Pingback: Ketchup With Us #2 « OldDogNewTits

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